I would have walked to the ends of the earth to save our marriage. The first three we think of as nice guys. She can't change if you aren't willing to express the problem. I am just something she can say she has and brag about the quality and the potential it has. I which you luck but its such a hard situation when your husbanx is acting so cruel and allways making you feel like a good for nothing and says everything is your fault. It is a large company, so our paths rarely cross, and I feel very strongly about keeping my social status completely out of my professional life, to the point that only close colleagues know that we are a married couple. They often appear controlling, domineering and selfish.
Decades of gate-keeping in our marriage have worn me down. Only what I don't do is pointed out. I live in a world of confusing mazes and rabbit trails that never seem to lead anywhere. Do you have a lot of Steves in your life? As a man, I feel most prepared to address this side of the issue. You cannot change him or his behavior. I am guilty of most of what you said.
But on the other hand, I can own it that part of that is me and my issues and sensitivities! The job in question was done in a timely manner and she did not have to remind you or bring up the fact that the job wasn't done in the first place. It is important that partners act like partners, give and take. Days I will focus on my happiness, I am accused of being selfish. It seems everyone and everything is more important than i am to him. Which, in turn, makes me angry.
So you know you have to watch you back. If I think she is screwing something up, then I should bear the blame with her rather than pointing a finger at her and letting her bear the blame alone. I can be quite mature in certain areas and a toddler in others. Instead of relying on your wife, could you invest in another friendship? Now that his mom is here and lives with us, my husband is showing his true colors. I believe at this point he needs to do what makes him happy and so do I.
Here we go again painting everyone with the same brush. So rather than feel the hurt, I numbed it out by learning to stay in my head rather than being present in my body, and by focusing on caretaking others' feelings. Now I have to be honest that in a relationship, Dick would be my last choice because who wants to live and have children with an asshole? But my soon-to-be-ex mixed in some good times and some genuine nice guy stuff occasionally and the qualities he had that I really valued and respected and thought of as rare. It sounds as though you are an intelligent woman who makes pretty good decisions. I am probably more oblivious than I know about things, as you can see I hardly ever ask questions,- and I am a horrible housekeeper. Glad, but sad to know there are others out there in the same situation.
My father was exactly the same with my mother but the marriage lasted forever even though my mother always have something to complain about but my father could not even care less to defend himself or even comoment he simply dismiss her complain and in most cases he is correct. It can be a big process to work through but I can promise your heart and nerves will be happy that you chose to stand in your truth. Your wife knows she is highly committed to you. And if I know I am challenged in these ways, I need to know that so I can figure out the right information to best be able to be successful. Does not ignore her, does go out of his way to be who her, is not rude to her,does respond when she is talking to him and does have conversations with her.
~ ~ ~ The Hollow I live alone together in the Hollow. He is making a crappy choice to default your word- and a good one! Today I initiated a real and somewhat difficult discussion since finishing the book and a few hours later my husband sent me a message about how it brought it a breathe of light. We have watched to many romantic comedies which inaccurately present burgers. If you see recurring patterns, have you spoken to him about that? Like I said, I have to ask for his hand to hold. To prefer the willfully damaging man flies utterly in the face of my conception of love.
I wish my wife had showed me this and talked to me and explained how she felt, but she did not. But, no matter how I try to share it with my wife, my words fall on deaf ears. In fact, a woman alone and owning cats, is 100 times better than being married to a man. Over the years, I have not felt truly desired and wanted. And for our First Year Anniversary he offered me to babysit for his daughter.
He kept going on and on about the way I made him feel and how I hurt his feelings. The lack of receiving attention and being ignored. Women need to stop attacking other women and get some sense. Will you tell her how she hurt you. There were signs of issues before we got married but I honestly believed in our friendship and I think that misled me. You are in charge of your life experience.
Tell him how it makes you feel and if you want an open relationship too, ask for one. Your spouse may want to understand as opposed to comforting. No question it makes it harder to stay out of fight or flight biological attack or withdraw when things gets real. Let God be your ultimate healer and keep your relationships free and full of love. But because he insists that he really is looking after my interest, I doubt myself.